Three Patterns That You Might Not Want to Make for a Guy. And Six that You Might.

Making something for a guy, something that he will actually wear, can be tricky.  They don’t always know what they like but they usually know what they don’t like. You don’t want to waste your time on the latter.

Tip # 1: Don’t go making him something that you would like to see on him. That’s not the same at all.

That’s Ola. Its a very popular pattern. How many free hat patterns on ravelry generate 258 public comments? Not many. Why is this little hat so special? Well, I’ll let you click over and see for yourself. I’m not quite sure the whole picture is safe for my blog.

Do be do be do….. Oh did you come back? Good. I wasn’t sure I’d have any readers left after that.

See what I mean about making stuff that you would like for him? Its not at all the same as making stuff he would like for him.

Two hat patterns he might like: Turn A Square by Jared Flood and Crochet Seafarer’s Cap by Beth Hall. They might be less fun to look at (and to show your blog) but these patterns would work for guys who don’t care to frolick around in muddy stream banks wearing only a hat.


Tip #2: Don’t make a sweater that makes him look like Ernie (or any other adorable childhood icon). As in Burt & Ernie.

Debbie Stoller I LOVE you. I love your books and I have recommended your Stitch ‘n Bitch to countless beginning knitters. It has everything they need to get started. But the Ernie Sweater? Sorry. I can’t get behind that. I have never met any guy old enough to have a driver’s licence that would wear that. There are a handful of knitters on ravelry that claim their guy loves the Ernie sweater they made for him. Those are very special guys I think.

Want a safer sweater choice? Try Smokin’ by Jared Flood (I know, I know. I LIKE Jared Flood.) Its published in the same book as the Ernie sweater and has a better chance of actually being worn in public. For my crocheters, try The Varsity Sweater by Shannon Mullett-Bowlsby. I like that one too. I like the double stripes on just one arm. So classic.


Tip #3 – Don’t make your guy kilt hose (or any fancy knee length sock) in the hopes that he will take to wearing kilts. If I thought that strategy had any merit at all, I would be all over it and making lots of kilt hose. Sadly this is not the 1700’s and most men, outside of the occasional history buff who goes to lots of festivals, are not going to appreciate all the time it takes to make these babies. Or even wear them.

You know who would like a pair of John Aderson’s Kilt Hose? Young ladies. Or go all out with Cookie A’s Rhiannon Socks. Those would look adorable on a young woman in a knee-length skirt.

But if you want to make socks for guys try Ann Budd’s Seeded Rib Socks. In a dark color those look very manly. I’ve made two pairs. Guys seem to like them. If you are a crocheter… don’t make socks. Make slippers instead.


Its not that guys are any fussier or pickier about their clothes than gals. Its that society enforces a lot of conformity on men’s wear. By and large guys have to wear dark colors and look pretty much like all the other guys around them. I would feel sorry for them but they seem to prefer it that way. And I have other things to worry about that the sad fact that men wear boring clothes.


One final word of advice: If you are thinking of adding a stripe/border/elbow patch in dusty pink for “just a pop of color”, stop. Don’t. That’s girl thinking. Stay in the boy mindset. No pops.

One final question: How many of you download, bookmarked, and saved that picture of Ola to your phone? Be honest!



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10 thoughts on “Three Patterns That You Might Not Want to Make for a Guy. And Six that You Might.

  1. No way I’m looking at that guy. What is seen cannot be unseen. I’ve seen a lot. More than enough really.
    As for colors for men, My husband always claimed that bright colors attract bees. He was a dull but successful man whose only gesture to fashion was his tie collection.
    Dull, boring and plain. Stick to those criteria and he will wear it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. What good advice: dull boring and plain. (Poor, poor guys and their clothes. Still, I’m not feeling any pity there.They like it I tells ya.)

      I’m giggling at the image of a man camouflaging himself from those wicked bees. That’s the best excuse for dull clothes I’ve ever heard!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hmm… Perhaps he didn’t have a speedo to match the hat? Maybe he slipped and got his clothes too muddy for the picture? What if he’s trying to weed out the knitters with weak hearts?
    Either way, there’s only one thought left in my head: Why?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Why? Because it made his hat pattern very popular! lol

      To be honest when I first saw that pattern (sent to me by a naughty friend) all i could think about was how cold he must be. Brrr.

      Like

    1. Probably for the best. The headaches of new tech save you from having to explain later why you have such a picture to your mom or spouse or house cat whoever it is that the have to answer to!

      Like

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